Marriage can be tough. Really tough. It’s crazy to think that in today’s world, planning a wedding (and funding it) can seem like the hardest part of your marriage. In reality, it’s the easiest part of the whole ordeal. It’s our calling to stay true to ourselves and each other throughout these times, so we can keep the light of Christ shining in, on, and through our marriages. While marriage is a holy and precious gift, it is not easy. Add in a spouse – or two – who are building businesses and it’s 10 times harder to hold on to our joy and stay true to the vows we made. Luckily, with a lot of intention and even more Jesus, it is possible to enjoy a healthy and prosperous marriage. Let’s look at a few ways we can improve our married life as entrepreneurs.
Planning isn’t just for work…
Planning is key. And I mean really planning. The kind of planning that covers all of the bases, not a little bit here and there. I mean sitting down together and planning out your life. Review and plan for things like – how often you will go on dates, how often you will review your finances, and even time to be intimate. Carve it out before the chaos of life fills every second of your time.
As moms and wives, we often wear more hats than we can keep up with. Add in entrepreneurship, and we wear even more. There’s no such thing as a typical workday for us. The only certain thing is that things are going to change each day and it’s important to make sure you keep your spouse in the loop.
You both have to understand each other’s goals and be on the same page about where you want to take your business. It can be difficult for people who aren’t entrepreneurs to fully grasp how much work is involved in starting a business, so it’s essential to make sure that you talk about what you’re doing during the day and share more about your goals with them to help them better understand what exactly it is that keeps you busy from 9 am until midnight every night! Or, if you’re both in similar places like my husband and I, set boundaries and realistic expectations for who should be doing what and when.
Intentionality is the name of the game when it comes to not only a successful business but a healthy marriage. One of my favorite ways of being intentional in my marriage is by practicing the 2/2/2 rule with my husband. Be sure to check out this post for a complete breakdown of how it works!
Be Honest About What You’re Working On
As an entrepreneur, you don’t always have time to think about how your professional life affects your marriage. I’m guilty of believing that my professional life and my married life were two separate things. For most, this is probably true. For entrepreneurs, it’s almost the exact opposite. Without the support of our spouses, we will not be able to build successful businesses. Here are some ways my husband and I try to keep our relationship strong:
- Staying honest about what we’re working on.
- Sharing our business goals.
- Communicating about our struggles and challenges.
Do you see a theme here? If you are transparent with each other—if you own up to the fact that you don’t know certain things or can’t do certain things—you’ll foster a safer environment for communication in your marriage and foster a healthier marriage.
I remember times when I’ve told my husband, a fellow entrepreneur, that I have the bandwidth to support him with a task or project. In reality, I was swimming in tasks for my clients, the house, and working on this very blog. As a result of my lack of transparency, I added more pressure on myself and left him hanging when he needed me. A simple, “I would love to help with this, can we do it on X date? I have a lot on my plate today.” would have saved us both frustration and the heartache of feeling unsupported.
Stop the Comparison
As much as you want to have a healthy married life and be a successful entrepreneur, don’t compare your beginning to someone else’s end. It’s easy to look at all the entrepreneurs and married couples who are killing it and wonder what could be wrong with you. Why aren’t you further along in your journey? Why aren’t you feeling all the “good feels” your married friends are feeling?
Don’t compare your worst to someone else’s best in any area of your life. Everyone has seasons of success, and seasons of struggle. This applies to our marriages, our businesses, our friendships – everything. Most people only display the wins and not the losses. As you look at your journey, remember that it’s just that – YOUR journey. It won’t look like mine, or your mom’s, or your best friend’s. God has a unique and perfect plan for your life, your marriage, and your business. Trust in Him. Seek out His ways and presence to guide you and your husband through the seasons of sowing and hold on to your faith in the process.
Today, it’s easier than ever to work from home, build a business, and live our dreams. That’s one of the reasons so many people are doing it. This dream, however, doesn’t come without a few complications. When we add in our marriages, our children, and our personal lives, we have to be sure that committing to this dream is worth the risk. As you stand beside your husband and prepare to take action on your dreams, do not underestimate the power and protection of knowing who you are in Christ and living from that place. Your marriage depends on it, your business depends on it, and your life depends on it.
Are you a married entrepreneur? How do you encourage a healthy married life while juggling “all the things”? Comment below!
XOXO, JD
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